The "imaginary friend"

As children, we create ways to comfort ourselves and fill voids of loneliness through an “imaginary friend.” Our “friend” becomes everything we need and want at that moment, the perfect companion. As adults, this illusion differs yet appears to be similar. We create an image of that “guy/girl” that fulfills our fantasies of a great relationship with the perfect person. Our mind places a trick making us believe only what we want to at that time, just as when we were children. We hide behind this false illusion believing our pains from all the games are justified. The truth is we have developed a new form of an “imaginary friend”, the perfect partner. The difference with this “friend” is that the actual person may be real, but the dream of a great relationship, a companion, that person to comfort us is not real at all. We chase the illusion, pretending everything is as we see hoping to wake up happy. But as with any dream, we eventually wake up. The realities of our “imaginary friend” become apparent and the dream all begins to fade. We start to see the truth behind our fantasy person and the tricks our mind once played. And as if we were those children again, we push our “imaginary friend” away and move on and seek something real to believe in.

Patience is a Virtue

I was told today by a very old and dear friend that I am way too patient. We have been friends now for over 25 years, so she knows me quite well. I guess I never really thought of it as patience but rather as tolerant and understanding. The discussion was based on people taking advantage and not making decisions when it comes to relationships. We laughed at the whole "S**t or get off the pot" theory and realized it was true. I am naive I suppose and to allowing of those to walk all over me and the way I feel. But it's hard to lay down the law when you are so wrapped up in the situation you see no way around. The obvious answer is to severe ties and move on, but that is easier said than done. The hold is there and I feel stuck. I can see a solution and believe it's a positive decision, but the heart closes that out whenever possible. Sometimes I feel so stupid, like what the heck is wrong with me?? The answer is right at the tip of my nose yet I keep punishing myself. I did however get an inspiration at some point, but that seems very distant in the past now. How does one forget and move forward when there is some connection holding you in place?? Can I just shut the door and really feel relieved? I think I am just scared to lose a possibility of anything rather than find my way to the surface?? Crazy life and definitely in need of repair!